I haven’t written in a while, because I’ve been kind of hiding in a cave. Going on a month and half in the apartment alone, and until family came to visit, I was slowly driving myself into the ground, emotionally and physically. Going to the gym everyday for over an hour and half and sitting at home alone nearly every day.
I have a couple of wonderful close friends in the area still (more now that DCI tour ended), but they have families, and I have begun to feel like a burden. Though they never made me feel like one, I convinced myself that I was too much.
My mom came to visit and we had a couple nice days together and especially enjoyed time at Huntington Beach for the US Open of Surfing. It was a perfect day and just a wonderful way to take in some sun. It was beautiful.
This past week, my best friend and cousin, Melissa came to visit. Melissa and I have always been extremely close, since childhood. Since moving from the Chicago area to Indiana and then to Cali, our time together has become less and less, often just once a year endeavors that last only a few days.
In any event, as we have aged, our relationship has only strengthened and matured. Having her stay with me for a week in California was the longest time we have spent together since we were very little. It was wonderful spending the week enjoying being young, but also enjoying being young adults and going out and making memories in new ways.
Her last day here we went and got partially matching tattoos. It was a lot of fun. She got hers on her foot and I got mine on my side. We were both troopers and didn’t tear up or stop during the process. Mine took over an hour and a half and I didn’t take a break or cry. My artist was impressed 🙂
On another note, I had an unexpected, unnecessary run-in with reality today. I almost got sick, and I didn’t hold it together. I had approximately six minutes to go outside, let it out, get it together and go back to work. Ouch.
I am BEYOND ready to apply to law schools, and hopefully move back toward home. The longer I live here, the longer I feel displaced. Well, I never felt like I belonged, really.
I have friends that mean the world to me here and I will miss them terribly if this all goes through, but I just pray unceasingly that I can start law school closer to family. Closer to Melissa, my brother and sister-in-law in the Midwest or at least norcal near my parents. I can’t do this living nowhere near family deal, any longer, at least as I see the reality of being single for quite a while longer. It would be a different story if I were serious with anyone, but nope.
I am thankful though, that I will be able to pick things up, yet again and get plugged into a new school and network. I will be applying in less than a month! Looking mainly in Illinois and New York. Let a new season of life begin.
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